Wednesday, July 25, 2012

...It's a Good Thing...

I was on the phone with my mom when I opened the email about Pharrell’s engagement.

Her response was an enthusiastic, “Ohh! That’s good news. They have kids, right?”

“Yep, one boy.”

“Good for them. That’s a good thing.”

And while I know you don’t believe me, I agree.

Maybe now we’ll get to see her smile for once.

And maybe now people will stop referring to her as “wifey” which is high on my list of words I wish I could set on fire never to be used again. It’s not a real word people, it’s a Judy Blume book about two sluts married to each other and their disintegrating marriage, and the term is not used positively.

As far as I’m concerned that word lives next door to the c-word. Yeah that one.

But I digress, this is a happy occasion and congratulations is definitely in order.

Had I bet money, I could throw a party right now because I predicted an engagement right after Shae’s wedding pictures were released.

I know countless women that have been banking on this theory for years, but there are some that might suggest that a guy gets to a certain age when he looks around and all of his friends are married and he starts thinking he might as well get married, too.
For every proud, odd duck there’s one that secretly wants to be part of the flock.

To each his own, and God speed. We can’t all fly solo.

Frankly, it’s very, very possible that it’s all genuinely based on mutual love and respect for other.

Or use of the same hallucinogen.

<><><><> <><><><> <><><><>
I agree, honey. We should go out in public like this.


I should say something nice.

Your girl is lovely, Hubbell.

Oh right, something nice.

Okay, I must say she has nice skin.

And I’d say that even if I wasn’t sitting her covered in aloe due to an eczema flare. (Curse you, Werther’s Caramel Apples. Delicious, delicious candy from the depths of skin inflammation hell!!!... I love you.)

But really, she has lovely skin.

See, I can be nice.

Anyway, congratulations to Sid and Nancy, I mean Pharrell and Helen. Never mind the bollocks, lasting happiness to you both.

It’s good to do the right thing.

So, I have no idea what Pharrell has been eating lately, but I hope he keeps eating it because he's been putting out some nice crap.

Get it, get it?

Nice crap... from what he's been eating?

Never mind. (Plus, as I re-read that it comes out really wrong in the context of this post. Good grief.)

This song sounds like bluebirds flying in your window in the morning and landing on your finger. Hum it and see if you don't hear what I'm talking about.
Yuna - Bad Idea

The best version of this song is the most stripped down one; this is the closest I could find. This song sounds like a disenchanted mermaid contemplating quitting her day job as a bartender on the beach.
Apparatjik - Do It Myself

Sounds like skating backwards with your eyes closed then tripping over a tiny rock a few inches too close to a scarp.
Buddy f/ Kendrick Lamar - Staircases

Prayers to friends and family in Colorado.
R.I.P. Sherman Hemsley

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