Saturday, July 31, 2010

...Language Nerds Rule...

Because we find this way too funny.
Take a look now before it gets yanked like all the other classic cartoons online!

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

...Hopefully You'll Find this Interesting...

I keep seeing these questions on all the blogs I visit so at the risk of being ordinary, I thought I’d try them, too. I can’t possibly imagine what you might get something from it that might be helpful to you, but try and enjoy it anyway.

What do you hope to accomplish in the next 10 years?

  • A beautiful living space that I am happy in.
  • I’m published (an actual book deal, not the stuff I did in school, or that I do now at work).
  • And a nice, fun, and reliable travelling companion.

Describe yourself in one word?

  • “multifarious” (That’s kind of cheating, right?)

Do you have a mantra?

  • No, not really. (That’s not the mantra, I’m saying I don’t have one.)

If you weren't a Guv’ment drone what would you be?

  • Full time writer (fiction, comics)
  • Voiceover artist for cartoons
  • Neuroscientist
  • Ballerina
  • Opera singer

You feel happiest when?

  • Everything is quiet, nothing hurts, my breathing is even and the room smells good.

People would be surprised to learn ...

  • I’ve “never been kissed”
  • I play 4 musical instruments (I just don't play them well)
  • I can wriggle my eyebrows like this

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

...School Is For Suckas...

And the rest of my Top 12 Scams of Everyday Live that I’d like to get “in” on.

-1-  College: Save money for 18 years so you still have to take out a loan to waste four years of your life being spoon-fed information that will be completely useless to you for the rest of your days.

And that better job you’re supposed to get with a college degree is more about who you know than what you know.

-2- Doctors: (Not nurses, medical examiners or forensic pathologists). Add the drug company bonus for getting you hooked on certain drugs and the incentives to diagnose (or not diagnose) certain illnesses to their regular salary and you have a nice little bankroll going.

In 12 years, I haven’t found anyone to diagnose the cause of my headaches but I have enough drug samples and cancer screenings to open a small clinic.

-3- Insurance (any kind): You pay hundreds or thousands of dollars a year to make sure you don’t have to pay hundreds or  thousands of dollars that you might not have had to spend in the first place.

-4- BP or Bank Executive: I don’t know what these people get paid to do, but they seem to be very well paid for not doing it, barely doing it, or doing a crappy job of it.

-5- “Urban” Clothing Lines: Make giant tees and jeans. Shrink them and call them the “woman’s line.” It doesn’t matter if they fit, people will buy them because of the name.

-6- Taxes: If there is “no taxation with representation” then shouldn’t you be excused from paying taxes if the guy you voted for doesn’t win? Don’t like your representative? No city taxes. Hate the senator? No state taxes. Voted for the other guy for president? No federal taxes.

Voting’s not all that “secret” or “anonymous” anyway, so all you need is a “receipt” at the voting booth.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

...This is Musicianship at Its Finest...

Despite a slight speech impediment and a less than cooperative instrument, he finishes the song.
Still don't know what a "crambone" is, but this rocks!

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

...Drummers Are So Hot!...

While I am a fan of all musicians, for reasons I can't put into words I am, have always been, and continue to be stuck on drummers.

Exhibit A - You don't know if you should shake your butt or laugh

Exhibit B - I wish you could see the look on my face whenever I watch this

Exhibit C - You almost forgot he was a drummer, too, didn't you?

Exhibit D - This one, too

Exhibit F - Is there no wonder Booty Greene has toured with Jill Scott and  N.E.R.D.

Exhibit G - Pardon my drool

The defense rest.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

...Prince is King...

It's unlikely that it would ever happen, but I would love to see Prince on "Dancing with the Stars"!!

In the meantime, please enjoy this classic.

prince dirty mind
- Watch more Videos at Vodpod.

Still one of my favorite songs and videos!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

...Sometimes I Just Wonder ~ "Children's Songs" edition

These songs are deep, man

And yes, we were sober when we thought of this.

But during a sing-along with a friend, we realized that some of these children’s songs are profound, secretly coded, or otherwise more adult than you might originally think.

Not since reading the original Grimm’s Brothers collection of fairy tales have I been so enthralled by the not-so-innocent context of something! Amazing!

Bear went over the mountain

  • Summary: Bear goes over this mountain just to see what’s over there only to discover it’s just the other side of the mountain.
  • The Truth: It’s a cross between ideologies about the grass not always being greener on the other side, and a crisis tale of dissatisfied curiosity and exploration

She’ll be coming ‘round the mountain

  • Summary: This lady shows up on wagon pulled by six white horses and everyone goes out to greet her and celebrate
  • The Truth:  Song is about death, dude, plain and simple. The apocalypse is nigh!

Itsy bitsy spider

  • Summary: Spider rises, falls and rises again in his efforts to reach the top of a waterspout
  • The Truth: This one is really deep. He’s washed out by the rain, which symbolizes turmoil, turbulence, chaos, and other threatening setbacks. He could have died, man, but he hung in there for better days, regained his footing, and triumphantly crawls up again to his destination. It’s about not being deterred by life’s little upsets and knowing that the sun will shine again if we are patient, faithful, and diligent.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

...I Love a Good Wipeout...

ABC's Wipeout is the best thing to happen to me television-wise ever since my cable company killed off G4, depriving me of Ninja Warrior.

Prior to that I was addicted to another program based on a Japanese game show called Takeshi's Castle. I shouldn't say "based on" because basically it was the same show with English voiceovers.

At any rate, Wipeout meets my need to get a good laugh in every chance I can. Between the visuals, commentary, and sound effects, I'd say you have a pretty decent recipe for a guaranteed smile.

My personal favorite ~ Enjoy!

Have a Safe & Happy 4th!!

Thursday, July 1, 2010

...I Keep Looking Sideways...

 run into some strange things in my line of work, but perhaps the thing that perplexes me the most are incidents of suicide in the elderly.

I wonder what makes a nearly 80-year-old person take their life. I especially wonder this in cases of lifelong depression. I think, ‘well you lasted this long, why would you give up now?’

Or maybe it’s just years of attempts and finally… well, finality.

Maybe it’s losing all of your friends, seeing the world change into something inexplicably sad, or not wanting to deal with chronic pain anymore. (and you know I can relate to the last one!)

Or years of some kind of something building up. I say “something” because I don’t know what to call it; it’s just something you feel that doesn’t feel very good, doesn’t feel right.

Sometimes you wear it like skin. Other times it lives inside of you and feeds off your heart, your mind, your spirit. And then it replaces all of your internal organs with little rocks of hatred.

Well maybe not rocks, because sometimes it feels alive, doesn’t it?
I think mine looks like this: