Sunday, July 31, 2011

...You Have to Back It Up...

We can't all drive backwards like Diddy in the Hypnotize video, but this is pretty ridiculous.

And I should apologize in advance since you will definitely spend the rest of the day randomly spouting, "reverse... reverse..."

And in case you forgot...("Hypnotize")

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

...It's You...

Things are still not great.

The main reason I’m in such distress is because I’m still not allowed to speak about what’s going on. It’s interesting how there are so many of us who are so ill because we choose to hold on to things in order to protect others. And yet, none of it would even be an issue if someone else had put the same effort into protecting us in the first place. Or better still, if we thought enough of ourselves to be our own protectors.

Predator complaining about something...again.
My personal Predator is being allowed to manhandle, manipulate, and skip off scot-free because they have a life threatening condition. Allegedly.

As horrible as this sounds, you’ll never convince me they didn’t develop this condition as just another tactic to abuse the people closest to them. In fact, I wonder if they even really have it. If it’s really life threatening, and if it’s really made worse by stress, I wonder how they’ve managed to live this long. According to them, I am nothing more than a walking stress factor for them.

And yet they go on breathing.

Predator is in my home, on my nerves, complaining about everything and making it overwhelmingly clear to me that not only will evil show its ugly face on your doorstep, but it will eat your last fruit cup and not tell you until you go looking for it.

I mentioned before that I was looking into the Borderline Personality Disorder as a possible explanation for Predator’s disturbing behavior. I don’t typically believe in things like this. I think there can be a chemical imbalance sometimes. I think drugs or alcohol or even sex can fundamentally alter the mind. I think some people have traumatic experiences and can have difficulty coping either because they lack the knowledge, skills, or energy to do things differently. But I don’t believe every person who makes a series of bad choices does so because they are mentally ill. I think a lot of them are just bad choice-makers. And some of them are just dumb jerks.

I think Predator is a bad choice-making dumb jerk... even if the BPD signs are there.

According to these books, it all comes down to a feeling of emptiness, unworthiness, and fear of abandonment or rejection. BPDs act this way mostly with people they love because they want to prove themselves right. If they can push you away, then it must be true. They are unworthy and unlovable.

If that’s not the most assbackwards …

Sunday, July 24, 2011

..."Little Man, I've Had a Busy Day"...

Another long time favorite.

I still don't know which part I love more: the bank (I want to deposit $200 please. It's in pennies.) or the salon of beauty (Of course not lady, someone just came along and put it there to annoy you.)

("Wild Wife" (Merrie Melodies))

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

...It's Me...

You'll have to excuse me.
I'm in the middle of a nervous breakdown.
Please enjoy this classic Fu-Schnickens video and I'll see you next week.

Fu-schnickens – Breakdown

Sunday, July 17, 2011

...I Stayed In this Sunday...

But Brother Franklin went all out.

I hope you always find time in your day to do at least one thing you "feel like" doing :)

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

...Eggshells are Bound to Crack at Some Point...

Seems like every time I sit down to do some work on this blog, when I go back to edit I find something like this hidden in the text:

I try to hide it from my brain, but my heart is very much aware of how I feel about you. I do not like you, barely love you, and have in the past wished that you were dead just to be free of you. There are times when you make comments about killing yourself that some small part of me feels happy anticipation that you might do it; and other parts of me that knows that you are a liar, a fake, a complete phony, and you love to talk about your misery, but action is no longer part of who you are.

Here’s another one:

You say you try to get XXXXX to leave you alone but they won’t go. But if our relationship is any indication, I think realistically, you scream at them to go away all while you hold on to them to make them stay because you think you are shit when you’re alone.
I’m starting to think you’re shit, too.
A pathetic, narcissistic, head on backwards, delusional, disrespectful, lying, abusive, dumbass….

And it goes on. These aren’t even in the same article. I have a ton of articles (I stopped counting at 9) that I started but couldn’t finish because I was distracted by something, time constraints, or just frustrations. When I go back to look them over and see what the possibilities are, at some point I find a paragraph or two that as best as I can tell was written by some angry alter ego.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

..."Wait 'til You See these Swell Programs"...

While we're still (sort of) on the subject of TV, check out this fine programming produced by Spike the dog for the Warden. There are a million funny little details here.

"Cellbound" (Tex Avery)

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

...It's Show Time!!...

Possibly the only thing worse than the state of modern music is the state of modern television. With the exception of Wipeout and almost anything on the History Channel, I don't really watch much TV anymore.

I used to be one of those people that had the TV on all the time just for "background noise" but I found that even though I wasn't paying attention to it, it was doing something weird to the atmosphere. I'm just inches away from cancelling my cable altogether.  So I found myself feeling a little big nostalgic for all the things I loved about TV as a kid.

Join me, won't you?

As I started putting this list together, it got crazy long and out of control. So in an effort to force myself to narrow it down, I had to set up some criteria:
  • Great theme music (Which is one of the ways this list got so out of control in the first place)
  • Great childhood memories to go along with it. ( I remember this one time…)
  • Show needed to actually be good (as in “entertaining program I actually looked forward to seeing on a regular basis.)
  • I could find it online. (Obviously)
And that’s it… let’s go.

(In no particular order)

Great Space Coaster - This makes me flash back to getting my hair combed in the morning before school. And the time Cassie got frostbite. (HAHAHA. I'll have to tell you about that one day.)

The Fall Guy - Why did every show in the 80s have a similar looking blonde chick on it?

A Different World - The show wasn't as good during the later seasons but I chose this version of the theme because Boyz II Men sang it, and I had the biggest crush on Mike McCary back then.

21 Jump Street - Seriously, just don't even call me on Sunday at 7p.