Wednesday, June 27, 2012

...It's an Invasion of the Bean Snatchers...

I have a magic bean.

I know it’s not literally a magic bean but I call it that because of all of the amazing things that have grown from it and that I’m sure will come later.

Whenever I tend to it, I notice something else awesome about it. I love it and it makes me smile. That’s pretty magical. I hope it never loses its magic.  I lay awake some nights hoping it’ll always be okay.

There are some people out there that are anything but magical beans. They’re like, anti-beans or something….Bean-o, if you will.

Maybe, Bean snatchers.

I have one of those, too.

Bean snatchers are those angry, miserable, unhappy people who are always mad, sad, or dramatically upset about something. There’s always something wrong. No one knows the trouble they’ve seen, nobody knows their sorrow.

Yeah, well, nobody cares either.

Sunday, June 24, 2012

...I Could Watch this All Day, Mayne...

It's funny but it was created out of a serious context.

{Terrence Howard says "Mayne"}

Directed and edited by Diran Lyons:

"Terrence Howard Says 'Mayne' (Hustle and Flow Supercut)" emphasizes the androcentric use of language in Craig Brewer's film "Hustle & Flow." The video was inspired in part by Ewuare Osayande's essay, "Manufacturing Pimps: Rewarding the Violent Repression of Black Women." In it, Osayande presents a powerful critique of the film's glorification of male-dominance and the exploitation of women.

I don’t necessarily agree with everything in the essay but it’s a good read with some interesting points.
PiNK COUNTER = MAYNE is said to a woman.
BLuE COUNTER = MAYNE is said total, man, woman, thing, ho, or trick.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

...It's Better to be Late than Dead...

Summer tiiiiime, and the living is easy…..

It’s time for family reunions, summer camp, and an extra sprinkle of baby powder in your bra.

And vacations!

All summer long we can expect to see the long train of cars travelling across highways for college road trips, graduation parties, amusement parks and other fun destinations.

I thought I’d share a few tips to make sure that no matter where you go, you arrive alive because maybe the only thing worse than being injured or jailed as a direct result of your carelessness and/or stupidity is that last moment before your last breath when you have just enough time to think about it and  regret it all.

I don’t imagine the tail-gating event that you’d like to participate in is a funeral procession, so please be smart and drive like someone out there loves you.

Let’s start with the obvious:

 - - No driving under the influence (Alcohol, legal or illegal drugs, annoying passengers, etc.)

 --No driving distracted (making/taking calls, texting, eating, drinking, smoking, reading, applying beauty aids, sleeping or engaging in sexual activity, etc)

 - - Avoid accidents: “go” before you leave. (and by accidents I mean crashing your car or tinkling yourself)

--Pack your patience. Everyone wants to get to where they’re going safely. That guy isn’t driving slow to annoy you and if he is, so what. It’s not that serious.

Sunday, June 17, 2012

{Happy Father's Day!}

This little girl demonstrates how good fathering skills make their way back around.

It's okay, Dad, you're still a winner to me.

Have a Happy Father's Day!

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

...I Fought the Blot...and the Blot Won...

Holidays and special occasions can be difficult when you’ve lost someone you care about.

I miss my dad all the time and naturally I’m thinking about him a lot now with Father’s Day around the corner. 

When my dad got sick that week before he passed, he was watching TV when he … let’s say tossed his cookies. I was going to say he called Earl, but doesn’t seem right to use that expression when his brother Earl preceded him in passing.

My mom cleaned the mess but at the most random times the stain would come back, stay awhile and disappear. It varied in size and shape and I swore to my mom it was a sign. She thought it was a sign that he didn’t move a bit faster and make it off the carpet to the bathroom.

I never determined the pattern of the returning stain before she moved but I wished I had paid closer attention. I’m sure it was something.

After my mom moved, she found a restaurant in the area that made pretty good Coney dogs and she would stop in periodically for a pick up.  I went in one day to pick up her order. “Now before you go in I should tell you there’s a regular customer in there who looks weirdly familiar.  He’ll be sitting at that little island right next to the cakes. Oh, and if the cake looks fresh, get a slice of caramel.”

Sunday, June 10, 2012

...Yes, It's Funny...

But it sounds good, too.

It kind of sounds like D'Angelo and the Beatles had a musical baby.

(Chad Hugo & Treezy)

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

..."You don't seem important"...

Someone actually said that to me. A co-worker.

It all started after I was offered a certain intern to help with a project I’m working on. I refused and in so many words let it be known that I didn’t care much for that particular intern’s attitude.

I found her to be rude and snotty, and one day in passing she actually looked me up and down, stuck her nose up in the air and flipped her hair at me when we had passed in close proximity.

Co-worker laughed. “She didn’t know who you were. I’m sure if she had known she would have been kissing your [arse] like she does everyone else higher up around here.”

“She’s an intern. If she’s trying to get in full time, shouldn’t she just be nice to everyone? Especially if she doesn’t know who the person is?”

“Yeah, but she probably thought you were another intern or something. You look like a kid. You hardly speak. You don’t seem important.”

I had to think about that one a minute. Some people are foolish, some are mean-spirited, some seem directionless, but I’m not sure about anyone truly being “not important.”

Sunday, June 3, 2012

...You Will if You Believe You Will...

I sobbed hysterically.

I am overwhelmed and exhausted with hearing about craziness and crime and people just being butt-monkeys, so it was a pleasant surprise to find a link to something positive. I’m not sure when I started bawling but wow, this video really flipped on the waterworks for me.

This is the story of Matt W. who despite being given the option to sit out field day at his elementary school, chose to run the full two laps. When he starts to slow down he’s shown the most amazing amount of support from his gym teacher and classmates.

Oh, and minor but critical point: Matt has spastic cerebral palsy.

I tell myself that I can do whatever I put my mind to doing but it’s easy to forget when you’re in the middle of whine-fest.

Don’t ever say you can’t, because you can.